Hurry and submit for this awesome FREE $35 P&G coupon booklet! Inside there will be $3.00 in Mr. Clean Coupons! There should be a $1.00 Mr. Clean Magic Eraser Coupon included which means free Magic Erasers! I LOVE MAGIC ERASERS!!!
Home Depot Deal:
- Mr. Clean Magic Eraser 1 ct Trial Size = $1.00 - $1.00/1 coupon = FREE
Thanks Hannah!!!
Friday, February 10, 2012
FREE Mr. Clean Magic Erasers - Home Depot Deal!
Tuesday, February 7, 2012
I Don't Want To Be The Mayor Of Primary Children's Hospital!!!
I can't believe it's been almost two weeks since my sweet Baylee's heart surgery at Primary Children's Hospital. As we checked in to the hospital I also decided to check in via Foursquare/Amy SoSavvy on my cell phone since a friend of mine recently challenged my competitive sensibilities. (If you're not in to Foursquare, it's basically a way to tell your friends where you are and what you're doing, as well as get discounts to restaurants and stores. Hospital discount anyone?) If you're the person who visits any particular store or location the most you get to be the mayor - in name only of course - of that location! If you're already in to Foursquare you may have that one friend who is always checking in everywhere and has a bazillion badges and points. If you have one of those friends you'll find yourself checking in to gas stations just to get an extra 2 points!) But immediately upon checking in I wished I could erase my check after I saw a pic of the hospital's Foursquare Mayor! "I don't want to be the Mayor of Primary Children's Hospital", I told myself, as that would mean I had visited the hospital more than anyone else. "Uncheck, Uncheck Uncheck!!!!!"
It was now 6:30 am and Baylee and I were ushered in to a small room to await the dreaded IV. The anesthesiologist gently reminded us that we would get one shot at the IV and then he would have to use gas (which he did not like to do) if Baylee wouldn't let them put an IV in. With a huge smile of confidence my daughter said one shot was all she needed as long as they used the J Tip. The anesthesiologist had no idea what we were talking about but the nurses informed him it has only been in use for the last 2 months. If you know about our last IV incident (otherwise known as the scream heard round the world) then you can appreciate what a miracle, albeit small, it was that PCH had literally only just started using this hand numbing liquid a week before Baylee had to go in for her Cardiac MRI. Such a blessing!
We got the IV - no sweat and headed in to the general waiting area in the O.R with all the other children getting prepped for surgery. It is truly heart wrenching to see so many children in desperate need of care. We waited ominously to hear our name called and then be quietly escorted to the operating room. Before handing Baylee off to the surgeons (there were 5 due to Baylee's unique heart configuration and I think the newbies wanted to check it out for themselves) I was allowed to give her a brief hug and kiss. It was not nearly long enough! I wanted to hold on to her and not let go, to weep with her and tell her in a million ways how much I loved her and everything about her in case this was our last goodbye, my one last moment left to speak the words spilling out of my heart. But, the doctors must know that every parent feels this way and thus intentionally whisked my child into another room with a brief word of support. Baylee did not see the flood of tears streaming quietly down my face. It was better that way, I thought.
Next came the long and lonely walk to the surgical waiting room to worry and cry with all the other parents. Tim had stayed home to get the little boys off to school/babysitters before heading up to the hospital but that left me 60 minutes to let my mind wander aimlessly. I sat alone in a corner cubicle eating Oreo cookies and juice, trying to pretend like my world wasn't crashing around me. I'm pretty sure I didn't pull that off very well! While I waited the nurse would call out the names of children with surgical updates and escort parents to recovery rooms for happy reunions. It was during this time I noticed two small "consultation rooms" just behind the nurses check in desk. It became quickly apparent that I did not want to be called in to one of those rooms! Those rooms were the rooms that parents frequently came out crying from. Those rooms were the "bad news" rooms. "Please don't call me in that room" I repeatedly and frantically pleaded in my heart like some unsettling mantra.
Thankfully Tim arrived quickly, but the wait was long and tense. Every hour we got cryptic calls from the doctors letting us know the progress of the procedure and saying things like, "We're having a a little trouble...." I almost passed out twice from the overwhelming pressure of it all (and the hyperventilating of course!) after the surgery entered its 6th & 7th hour. The doctors struggled to find the spot in Baylee's valve that was causing her heart to skip a beat because there was not one, but three electrical pathways causing the trouble. All three were ablated and the doctors feel like the surgery was a success. We stayed in the hospital overnight which I still think is not long enough for a heart patient, but Baylee has recovered well and is back to school despite football sized bruises on each of her legs.
I am thankful for all the doctors, nurses, friends and family who sent their love, prayers and support our way. Baylee even received Get Well cards from as far away as Canada from people we didn't even know - Thank you! We are awaiting her 6 week check up and the results of the stress test but for now Baylee's heart is beating better than before. My prayer now is that whatever comes next for her that it will be as painless, quick and worry-free as possible and that I never have to become the Mayor of PCH!
It was now 6:30 am and Baylee and I were ushered in to a small room to await the dreaded IV. The anesthesiologist gently reminded us that we would get one shot at the IV and then he would have to use gas (which he did not like to do) if Baylee wouldn't let them put an IV in. With a huge smile of confidence my daughter said one shot was all she needed as long as they used the J Tip. The anesthesiologist had no idea what we were talking about but the nurses informed him it has only been in use for the last 2 months. If you know about our last IV incident (otherwise known as the scream heard round the world) then you can appreciate what a miracle, albeit small, it was that PCH had literally only just started using this hand numbing liquid a week before Baylee had to go in for her Cardiac MRI. Such a blessing!
![]() |
| Waiting in the O.R. |
Next came the long and lonely walk to the surgical waiting room to worry and cry with all the other parents. Tim had stayed home to get the little boys off to school/babysitters before heading up to the hospital but that left me 60 minutes to let my mind wander aimlessly. I sat alone in a corner cubicle eating Oreo cookies and juice, trying to pretend like my world wasn't crashing around me. I'm pretty sure I didn't pull that off very well! While I waited the nurse would call out the names of children with surgical updates and escort parents to recovery rooms for happy reunions. It was during this time I noticed two small "consultation rooms" just behind the nurses check in desk. It became quickly apparent that I did not want to be called in to one of those rooms! Those rooms were the rooms that parents frequently came out crying from. Those rooms were the "bad news" rooms. "Please don't call me in that room" I repeatedly and frantically pleaded in my heart like some unsettling mantra.
I am thankful for all the doctors, nurses, friends and family who sent their love, prayers and support our way. Baylee even received Get Well cards from as far away as Canada from people we didn't even know - Thank you! We are awaiting her 6 week check up and the results of the stress test but for now Baylee's heart is beating better than before. My prayer now is that whatever comes next for her that it will be as painless, quick and worry-free as possible and that I never have to become the Mayor of PCH!
My Kids Are Cuter Than Yours And I Can Prove It!!!
We all think our kids are the cutest little cusses on the planet to ever exist and at least on my part it's totally true - Hee Hee! (But seriously so true!) Anywho, there is a super fun Model Search Contest that is about to start here in Utah for Kid To Kid, a personal favorite shopping stop for me.
*Note: Make sure to like the Kid To Kid Facebook store location you'd like to be entered for!
KID TO KID February-Model Search.
The Model Search will be on Kid to Kid’s facebook page. Just upload a photo of your child and like the Kid To Kid Facebook store location you'd like to be entered for! The Search will run from February 9-23 with voting to run from February 24-29. There are 4 age groups that children can enter:
The winner will be in Kid to Kid store advertising and will be featured on other marketing ads and on TV spots. Yup - your kid might be on TV! How cool is that!! I know my kids would be ecstatic about the thought of being on TV - they already think I'm famous because they see my picture on the computer every day - LOL!
- 0-2
- 3-5
- 6-9
- 10-14
The winner will be in Kid to Kid store advertising and will be featured on other marketing ads and on TV spots. Yup - your kid might be on TV! How cool is that!! I know my kids would be ecstatic about the thought of being on TV - they already think I'm famous because they see my picture on the computer every day - LOL!
So if you want absolute proof that your kids are cuter than your snotty sister in law's kids enter HERE! (Bragging rights included!)
I'm sending in this pic of my adorable 3 year old!
I'm sending in this pic of my adorable 3 year old!
*Note: Make sure to like the Kid To Kid Facebook store location you'd like to be entered for!
Friday, February 3, 2012
Walmart Jergens Lotion Deal!
It was take your 7th grader to work day yesterday so my daughter and I ran out to good 'ol Wallyworld to get next weeks Walmart Double Coupon Tuesday deal list started. Her legs are still sore from the surgery so she got pushed the whole way. Do you know how hard it is to push a 12 year old in a shopping cart - geesh! We found lots of deals, but I love this Jergens Lotion deal and the Oral B Floss Roll Back!
Jergens 10 oz lotion (Makes sure to get the 25% extra bottles) $3.27 = $1.27 after $2.00 Coupon coming Sunday! You can also hold on to this coupon and wait for a sale on bigger bottles as well! The 8 oz size is only $3.00 at Kmart right now, so only $1.00 after coupon! WOW
If you live in Utah and still need to sign up for the newspaper at a super cheap rate Call (801) 344-2959 to start your subscription savings and tell them Amy sent you!
Monday, January 30, 2012
Purex Winner & Free Purex Samples
CONGRATS to my Purex/Jockey WINNER: Erin Carson!
No worries if you didn't win though because Purex just released a FREE Purex Triple Action Liquid Sample or if you wait a few weeks you can get a FREE Purex Ultra Packs Sample (limit 1 Purex Sample per year). Either way it's like you still get Free Purex!
Friday, January 27, 2012
Purex/Jockey Giveaway
CONGRATS TO MY WINNER: Erin Carson!
As a Purex Insider I often get to sample new Purex Fabric Softeners and Detergents before they have been released. This month I was asked to try a product that has already been on the market for a while and that I already love as well as another brand I love - Purex Crystals & Jockey!
You all know I love Purex Crystals - especially washing my kids pjs in them (Purex Crystals PJs Benefits!) I love how convenient they are to use and how AWESOME they make my clothes smell! (The Tropical Splash is especially yummy!)
Between blogging and taking care of my family, running on the treadmill in my office is a huge stress reliever. And while I don't get on the treadmill as often as I'd like to with my hectic schedule, I was so happy to be able to use my Purex Crystals to keep my new Jockey Tech Terry Sports Bra smelling fresh after I work out. If you are an exercise fanatic or the occasional walker (Lol - I almost said street walker but then I realized how bad that sounded! :) you know that sweat stains and odors are not fun to deal with! However, my new Jockey Tech terry Sports Bra has a moisture wicking technology that actually kept me dry and I felt cooler while I worked out. Translation - It felt so super comfortable and I didn't stink as much. (I'll refrain from posting a picture of myself in the bra. I'm sure you all will appreciate that!)
Liquid fabric softeners prevent moisture wicking fabrics from working properly so you'll definitely want to use Purex Crystals to launder your Jockey Sports Bra or exercise clothes!
And guess what - Purex gave me a Purex/Jockey Prize pack to give away - just like the one I got to try! Prize pack includes on bottle of Purex Crystals and a Jockey Tech terry Sports Bra! Enter below and I will pick a winner on Monday, 1/30, 10am. The Winner has 24 hours to respond after email notification or another winner will be selected. Good luck and in the meantime, Jockey is offering a 20% coupon to everyone!
As a Purex Insider I often get to sample new Purex Fabric Softeners and Detergents before they have been released. This month I was asked to try a product that has already been on the market for a while and that I already love as well as another brand I love - Purex Crystals & Jockey!
You all know I love Purex Crystals - especially washing my kids pjs in them (Purex Crystals PJs Benefits!) I love how convenient they are to use and how AWESOME they make my clothes smell! (The Tropical Splash is especially yummy!)
Between blogging and taking care of my family, running on the treadmill in my office is a huge stress reliever. And while I don't get on the treadmill as often as I'd like to with my hectic schedule, I was so happy to be able to use my Purex Crystals to keep my new Jockey Tech Terry Sports Bra smelling fresh after I work out. If you are an exercise fanatic or the occasional walker (Lol - I almost said street walker but then I realized how bad that sounded! :) you know that sweat stains and odors are not fun to deal with! However, my new Jockey Tech terry Sports Bra has a moisture wicking technology that actually kept me dry and I felt cooler while I worked out. Translation - It felt so super comfortable and I didn't stink as much. (I'll refrain from posting a picture of myself in the bra. I'm sure you all will appreciate that!)
Liquid fabric softeners prevent moisture wicking fabrics from working properly so you'll definitely want to use Purex Crystals to launder your Jockey Sports Bra or exercise clothes!
And guess what - Purex gave me a Purex/Jockey Prize pack to give away - just like the one I got to try! Prize pack includes on bottle of Purex Crystals and a Jockey Tech terry Sports Bra! Enter below and I will pick a winner on Monday, 1/30, 10am. The Winner has 24 hours to respond after email notification or another winner will be selected. Good luck and in the meantime, Jockey is offering a 20% coupon to everyone!
Update - How Do You Mend A Broken Heart?
I wanted to take a moment and update everyone about my sweet daughter Baylee's surgery. Baylee had her WPW Ablation surgery on Wed. the 25th at Primary Childrens Hospital in SLC (Love them!). The surgery was complicated by Baylee's unique heart structure and lasted 2 hours longer than usual. However, the doctors are hopeful they were able to stop her irregular heart beat from occurring again and Baylee is recovering well. When I get a moment to breath I'll post a full blog about our experiences.
Thanks again for all your thoughts and well wishes - they were definitely felt!
Tuesday, January 24, 2012
How Do You Mend A Broken Heart?
I am amazingly blessed to be living in an age where medical technology exists to prolong and improve our human existence. I feel fortunate to live within driving distance of an amazing hospital dedicated to helping children heal. It is truly miraculous that doctors can perform intricate heart surgeries on a daily and even hourly basis with immensely successful outcomes. I thank God for allowing me to live in this now and with this daughter who just years ago who have had little hope for survival. I thank God for her smile, for her laughter, for her pre-teen akwardness, for her hugs, for her kisses, for her making my bed and insisting it be a surprise, for her love of making brownies and for the life she's lived... but it's still hard.
Baylee and I spent the entire day together on Saturday getting manicures, pedicures, shellacks and more. I wanted her to feel how much I love her and, selfishly, I was trying to shape a few more happy memories in preparation for her upcoming heart surgery this week. I am overjoyed that Baylee can be relieved of arrhythmia complications, but it's still hard to send your baby to sleep and worry if she'll wake up.
Wednesday, Jan. 25th, I will take my sweet baby girl, just shy of her 13th birthday for her 1st heart surgery. I say first because it won't be her last. She will eventually require open heart surgery to replace a faulty valve due to her heart being transposed in her chest. The doctors on Wednesday will, through catheters, be able to remove a "flap of skin" that is making her heart take an extra beat (called WPW) and hopefully cure her of this potentially life threatening electrical problem. Just saying that sounds so completely crazy to me. From the non-invasive catheters, to the incredibly short one day hospital stay for heart surgery, to the results, I marvel at what a merciful God has enabled men and women to do for Our children... but it's still hard.
Emails will be slow in coming this weekend, though I think if our hospital stay gets extended that I may find myself posting from the pleather lounge chairs just to keep sane and distract myself from the what ifs. I'm a pro at what ifs. If there were some kind of medal for what iffery I'm sure I would win and hold the Guiness Book of World Records title. However, I did hear an amazing song this week that has helped me create a new outlook on our journey to mend her sweet little broken heart:
I know that you're afraid and I am too.
But you'll never be alone I promise you.
When you're weak I'll be strong.
When you let go I'll hold on.
When you need to cry I swear that I'll be there to dry your eyes.
When you feel lost and scared to death, like you can't take one more step,
Just take my hand, together we can do it.
I'm gonna love you through it!
-Martina McBride
I look forward to moving forward and loving my baby through whatever comes... but it's still hard.
Baylee and I spent the entire day together on Saturday getting manicures, pedicures, shellacks and more. I wanted her to feel how much I love her and, selfishly, I was trying to shape a few more happy memories in preparation for her upcoming heart surgery this week. I am overjoyed that Baylee can be relieved of arrhythmia complications, but it's still hard to send your baby to sleep and worry if she'll wake up.
Wednesday, Jan. 25th, I will take my sweet baby girl, just shy of her 13th birthday for her 1st heart surgery. I say first because it won't be her last. She will eventually require open heart surgery to replace a faulty valve due to her heart being transposed in her chest. The doctors on Wednesday will, through catheters, be able to remove a "flap of skin" that is making her heart take an extra beat (called WPW) and hopefully cure her of this potentially life threatening electrical problem. Just saying that sounds so completely crazy to me. From the non-invasive catheters, to the incredibly short one day hospital stay for heart surgery, to the results, I marvel at what a merciful God has enabled men and women to do for Our children... but it's still hard.
Emails will be slow in coming this weekend, though I think if our hospital stay gets extended that I may find myself posting from the pleather lounge chairs just to keep sane and distract myself from the what ifs. I'm a pro at what ifs. If there were some kind of medal for what iffery I'm sure I would win and hold the Guiness Book of World Records title. However, I did hear an amazing song this week that has helped me create a new outlook on our journey to mend her sweet little broken heart:
I know that you're afraid and I am too.
But you'll never be alone I promise you.
When you're weak I'll be strong.
When you let go I'll hold on.
When you need to cry I swear that I'll be there to dry your eyes.
When you feel lost and scared to death, like you can't take one more step,
Just take my hand, together we can do it.
I'm gonna love you through it!
-Martina McBride
I look forward to moving forward and loving my baby through whatever comes... but it's still hard.
Tuesday, January 17, 2012
*HOT DEAL* Kid To Kid Semi-Annual Sale! 1/19-1/21
If you have never shopped at Kid To Kid you, (and your kids), are missing out! About 6 months ago I ventured in to Kid To Kid to trade in some gently used clothes my kids had outgrown. To be honest I was a little out of my comfort zone, having never gone to Kid To Kid before, but they made my trip so easy!! The checked in my trade, sorted my clothes and gave me $17 on a store gift card! Do you even know what $17 will buy you at Kid To Kid!?! I bought my 12 year old daughter a "like new" Sunday dress, 2 brand name pairs of jeans and a super cute shirt! Holy Cow!! It's amazing!
Starting this Thursday, Kid To Kid is having their Semi-Annual Sale with everything marked an additional 10-70% off! Kid to Kid prices are like sale prices all year so and extra sale means incredible deals. I think I could almost fill my daughters closet for that $17 during this sale! This is definitely one sale you don't want to miss (or you'll have to wait another six months!)
Kid to Kid is located across Utah in:
- American Fork
- Bountiful
- Holladay
- Layton
- Lindon
- Ogden
- Salt Lake
- Sandy
- South Jordan
- St. George
- West Valley
Friday, January 13, 2012
Purex Ultra Packs Review & Giveaway - 3 Winners
Update: And the winners are:
Lori Howell
Caitlin Mixdorf
Hayley Steed
By now you all know how much I LOVE Purex Laundry Detergents and Fabric Softeners. It's extremely effective and reasonable priced laundry lovin'! I was recently given a free package of Purex Ultra Packs Liquid Laundry detergent and now I've found another reason to love Purex!
Purex Ultrapacks are pre-closed laundry packs that are so easy to use. At our house my 12 year old daughter is my main laundry helper and though she loves to sort and load the washing machine she sometimes end up with big spills and lots of load size measurement questions. (Not to mention my 3 year old who last week spilled an entire box of laundry soap ALL OVER the laundry room floor!) But, Purex Ultra packs make laundry detergent so convenient and easy to use! No spilling and amazing cleaning!
Purex is also giving me 3 coupons for a FREE Full Size package of Purex Ultra Packs to giveaway!! I'll draw 3 winners on Wed. 1/18 to receive one FREE Bottle each! Enter Now!
Lori Howell
Caitlin Mixdorf
Hayley Steed
Congrats! I'll contact you asap about your prize!
------------------------------------------
Purex Ultrapacks are pre-closed laundry packs that are so easy to use. At our house my 12 year old daughter is my main laundry helper and though she loves to sort and load the washing machine she sometimes end up with big spills and lots of load size measurement questions. (Not to mention my 3 year old who last week spilled an entire box of laundry soap ALL OVER the laundry room floor!) But, Purex Ultra packs make laundry detergent so convenient and easy to use! No spilling and amazing cleaning!
Purex is also giving me 3 coupons for a FREE Full Size package of Purex Ultra Packs to giveaway!! I'll draw 3 winners on Wed. 1/18 to receive one FREE Bottle each! Enter Now!
Hidden Duck Tape MONEY MAKER - Walmart Deal
I love it when I find an unmarked, unadvertised deal! It truly makes my day - weird huh?
Anywho, I was at Walmart late last night (as usual) and once again noticed some Christmas Print Tuck tape mixed in withe regular tape. I decided to scan it once again to check the price even though every time I've scanned it over the past few weeks it hasn't changed. To my surprise it scanned for only $0.75 ea - WAHOO!!!! With my $1.00 coupon that means I made $0.25 for each roll I bought! - Christmas Duck Tape = $0.75 - $1.00/1 (S11/20) = $0.25 MONEY MAKER
Make sure to check your Walmart for this sneak after Christmas deal!
Tuesday, January 3, 2012
My Sweet Little Broken Heart - Why This Heart?
D Day, Dec 28th, 2011. Quite reluctantly, I prepared to take my sweet little Baylee to Primary Children's Medical Center that morning for a Cardiac MRI to determine the strength of her heart muscle and whether or not the deterioration from her L Transposition and valve leakage was severe enough to warrant open heart valve replacement surgery in the near future.
I've realized I'm intentionally reluctant when it comes to her heart. Every year since her birth I've scheduled an annual trip to the cardiologist for a heart check up. And, every year I push off scheduling for a few months past the 12 month mark. It's kind of like the dentist. You know you have to go but no one likes to. I know she needs to go, but if I can just forget for a few days that she isn't quite perfect inside, it seems like a small reprieve from what may come. It doesn't really work - I just worry a few days longer - ugh, you'd think I'd learn. You see, I'm a genetic worrier. (There really is a genetic component to anxiety and worry I've been told. At least I choose to openly blame it on my mother, also a genetic worrier.) On a side note - why don't men worry? I don't get it! They seem to brush off the minor to major worry moments in life and simply see happiness and promise. If only....
Unfortunately, I've passed the worry gene down to my daughter and thus this hospital trip was doomed before it began. Baylee and I went over what would happen during the procedure, but no one told us about the necessary IV for contrast material. It was a flurry of "I'm leaving this hospital right now!" and, "I'm not doing this!" tearful shriekings with wisps of hair flying out of head bands for about 30 minutes. I kept repeating that we had to do this and there was no option - but I could not quiet her fear. I asked her to trust me, but she'd said that I have adult skin and she has kid skin and so it doesn't feel the same for her. How can she trust that when I say it doesn't hurt too badly that it won't hurt her too badly? In a strange way that kind of makes sense. About 15 minutes into the tirade my sweet Baylee finally screamed in desperation what I knew she would someday ask me, "Why do I have to have this heart!?!" In an instant my heart stopped and I could no longer keep up the facade of normalcy for her. As tears rolled down my cheeks she saw the worry on my face for the 1st time in her sweet life. I'd hidden it for years behind closed doors and muffled pillows, but now she knew. I hugged her as tightly as possible and then cradled her face gently in my hands. We spoke briefly about life, God and our existence here on this Earth. I told her I loved her and that it would be ok, though I'm really not sure it will be - I'm a worrier, remember.
By now the entire wing of the hospital had most definitely heard the commotion and a slew of nurses filed in to try and diffuse the situation. They demonstrated how small the needle was on a doll Baylee would get to take home, offered a video demonstrating techniques (seriously - why would they even offer this one!) and I even suggested a tranquilizer to calm her down! It was then that our small miracle occurred, one that I'm writing in my gratitude journal for sure, a nurse offered Baylee a J Tip to numb her hand before the IV would be inserted. A J Tip Miracle! Baylee agreed to let them hold her hand and without needles a syringe of supernatural liquid was released which instantly numbed the site and allowed them to insert the IV without Baylee even knowing the needle was already in. (I took this photo as a reminder for her ablation surgery that the IV DID NOT hurt! I'm saving the photo on my phone just in case!)
A little mild anxiety and a full length Rio DVD goggle watching later, the test was over and we were on our way home! With a new Webkinz Yorkie, IV doll and fingernail polish of choice, all compliments of the hospital, Baylee happily inquired if she would get presents every time she went. Guess all it takes is a few freebies and she's on board - just like her mom!
We got the results in record time the next day. Baylee's heart strength is in the normal, though "low" normal, range. I am thrilled by this! However, her valve leakage is moderate as detected on the earlier ultrasound. We're off for a few more tests like a Holter Monitor (24 hour heart monitor) and a treadmill stress test and tomorrow I'll be confirming the Cardiac Ablation surgery which should be in the next two weeks.
Sometimes I can forget she's a little broken, I hope I can forget again soon...
I've realized I'm intentionally reluctant when it comes to her heart. Every year since her birth I've scheduled an annual trip to the cardiologist for a heart check up. And, every year I push off scheduling for a few months past the 12 month mark. It's kind of like the dentist. You know you have to go but no one likes to. I know she needs to go, but if I can just forget for a few days that she isn't quite perfect inside, it seems like a small reprieve from what may come. It doesn't really work - I just worry a few days longer - ugh, you'd think I'd learn. You see, I'm a genetic worrier. (There really is a genetic component to anxiety and worry I've been told. At least I choose to openly blame it on my mother, also a genetic worrier.) On a side note - why don't men worry? I don't get it! They seem to brush off the minor to major worry moments in life and simply see happiness and promise. If only....
Unfortunately, I've passed the worry gene down to my daughter and thus this hospital trip was doomed before it began. Baylee and I went over what would happen during the procedure, but no one told us about the necessary IV for contrast material. It was a flurry of "I'm leaving this hospital right now!" and, "I'm not doing this!" tearful shriekings with wisps of hair flying out of head bands for about 30 minutes. I kept repeating that we had to do this and there was no option - but I could not quiet her fear. I asked her to trust me, but she'd said that I have adult skin and she has kid skin and so it doesn't feel the same for her. How can she trust that when I say it doesn't hurt too badly that it won't hurt her too badly? In a strange way that kind of makes sense. About 15 minutes into the tirade my sweet Baylee finally screamed in desperation what I knew she would someday ask me, "Why do I have to have this heart!?!" In an instant my heart stopped and I could no longer keep up the facade of normalcy for her. As tears rolled down my cheeks she saw the worry on my face for the 1st time in her sweet life. I'd hidden it for years behind closed doors and muffled pillows, but now she knew. I hugged her as tightly as possible and then cradled her face gently in my hands. We spoke briefly about life, God and our existence here on this Earth. I told her I loved her and that it would be ok, though I'm really not sure it will be - I'm a worrier, remember.
By now the entire wing of the hospital had most definitely heard the commotion and a slew of nurses filed in to try and diffuse the situation. They demonstrated how small the needle was on a doll Baylee would get to take home, offered a video demonstrating techniques (seriously - why would they even offer this one!) and I even suggested a tranquilizer to calm her down! It was then that our small miracle occurred, one that I'm writing in my gratitude journal for sure, a nurse offered Baylee a J Tip to numb her hand before the IV would be inserted. A J Tip Miracle! Baylee agreed to let them hold her hand and without needles a syringe of supernatural liquid was released which instantly numbed the site and allowed them to insert the IV without Baylee even knowing the needle was already in. (I took this photo as a reminder for her ablation surgery that the IV DID NOT hurt! I'm saving the photo on my phone just in case!)
A little mild anxiety and a full length Rio DVD goggle watching later, the test was over and we were on our way home! With a new Webkinz Yorkie, IV doll and fingernail polish of choice, all compliments of the hospital, Baylee happily inquired if she would get presents every time she went. Guess all it takes is a few freebies and she's on board - just like her mom!
We got the results in record time the next day. Baylee's heart strength is in the normal, though "low" normal, range. I am thrilled by this! However, her valve leakage is moderate as detected on the earlier ultrasound. We're off for a few more tests like a Holter Monitor (24 hour heart monitor) and a treadmill stress test and tomorrow I'll be confirming the Cardiac Ablation surgery which should be in the next two weeks.
Sometimes I can forget she's a little broken, I hope I can forget again soon...
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